So at lunch today I got a V8 Juice Splash and asked the lady at the store if she had a straw. She regretfully informed me that she did not. So I left and prepared to drink my juice straight out of the bottle--like an animal!--and preceeded to dribble some all over my sweater. So I cleaned it off and took another sip and spilled it all over my front.
I'm like an infant!
Years of drinking everything with straws in order to prevent my lipstick from fading has caused me to completely forget how to drink like a normal person. Pathetic.