Thursday, June 30, 2005

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Oooooo....Aaaaaahhhh

This week's SFist post is up. And it might scare the pets!

Eyewitness Four


I consider myself kind of well-read when it comes to the issue of comics. Kind of. At least, I read a lot in the 80s and 90s, and know enough about the history of comics to maintain at least a 10 minute conversation with a true comic book nerd. But I admit to never picking up a single issue of "The Fantastic Four" nor watching any of the TV versions. So my question to the more knowledgeable is, has the Fantastic Four logo always been so lame?

Look at that! Did the marketing department just get tired of thinking about a good logo, and instead just went with something they saw watching the news?

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

I Wouldn't Give My Troubles to a Monkey on a Rock

I've got a headache. Unless some really exciting TV news comes along, I probably won't be posting much today.

In the meantime, here's something truly terrifying.

Monday, June 27, 2005

"Hey, What's This Show About, Anyway?"

"Oh, I don't know. They say it's some big gorilla."

Yup. A big gorilla. For those of you who haven't been bombarded with the news, the trailer for Peter Jackson's King Kong is premiering tonight all over the freaking place.

I'm not yet sure how I feel about this remake. I am confident in the talents of Mr. Jackson, but part of me has the "Why bother?" reaction...I mean, the film was already remade so masterfully in 1976!

(And yes, that's sarcasm, son, in case you're a little slow today.)

Sucky

Well, as demonstrated by the post below, this weekend was kind of sucky. My excitement over my new cable was overshadowed by the tragedy that befell my TiVo. I've reached the acceptance stage of grief over that, and I'm trying to look at the bright side. While I lost some recordings and season passes that I had managed to save for years, the hard drive cleaning has resulted in a zippier TiVo. Also, since it's summer, I didn't have as many season passes to recover as I usually do. I did my best to get them all back, but I'm sure I've forgotten some...

The biggest annoyance was that the "this will take an hour" message was a load of bull, as I suspected. I was afraid it might not recover at all (I had read horror stories from other people wherein it just stayed on that screen for days) but instead it took about 4 hours. After which I had to do the whole TiVo set-up thing, and it had to make The Call and get all the programming stuff, and index it and everything, so that took another 4 hours. Which meant I didn't have anything recorded for Sunday.

And that would normally be fine, because I had planned on spending the weekend with some Netflix movies, in an attempt to save some money by not going out. But, you see, someone STOLE MY DVDS! My mailbox has been broken for a couple of months now (a long story, and partly my fault, which is why I haven't had the landlord fix it. Like I said, long story. ) but I figured, it's behind a gate, and I'm sure my neighbors are trustworthy. If they see my mailbox is open, they aren't going to STEAL anything, for pete's sake.

Wrong. WRONG!

None of my three Netflix DVDs arrived this week, even though they were sent out to me on Monday. And, come to think of it, I haven't gotten a few issues of some magazines in a while either. Damn IT! So, to the asshole who took my movies, I really hope you enjoyed In the Realms of the Unreal. Something tells me if you're the kind of idiot who steals mail, you're not the kind of person who would enjoy a documentary about outsider art. Jokes on you!

So, the majority of my Sunday was devoted to reprogramming my TiVo which, what with all the new stations and all, took a loooong time. But I was able to catch a showing of The Long, Long Trailer on TCM, so the day wasn't a complete bust...

And hopefully the sad, blank screen that is my "Now Showing" list will fill up soon with my season pass recordings and kooky TiVo suggestions...

Saturday, June 25, 2005

Despair

I was so happy. I figured out how to get the TiVo and my new digital cable to be friends, and I was programming movies left and right. Sure, there's a bit of a lag time when I change channels, but patience is a virtue, right?

What I couldn't stand, though, was the fact that TiVo kept bringing up this stupid demo screen and video every 30 minutes---WHILE I was watching stuff. So I did some looking on the Internets and found what I thought was the answer from the TiVo site.

But it wasn't....oh, it wasn't. The advice they gave was for a different model, so when I did it on mine, it ended up RESETTING THE ENTIRE TIVO. It didn't even give me a warning. No "Are you SURE this is what you want to do?" message. It just did it! That means all my season passes, the recordings I had saved, all my favorites, gone. Five years of slow and steady TiVo programming gone. Forever!

And now I'm stuck looking at a screen that says "Clearing and deleting everything. This will take an hour." Like a constant taunt. And I just KNOW it's going to take more than an hour--if it ever reboots at all....

Oh TiVo. Why hast thou forsaken me?

Friday, June 24, 2005

Promise Broken. Again.

But only sort of. Crazy was on the "Today" show this morning, and TVGasm's illustrated transcript just made me do a spit-take.

Holy Shitsu!

I just perused the monthly schedule for Turner Classic Movies and nearly had a stroke. There are TOO MANY MOVIES I WANT TO WATCH! What have I gotten myself into? The tiny, measly bit of a real life I have will soon evaporate, my muscles will atrophy, and I won't be able to leave the couch for more than bathroom breaks and opening the door for the occasional delivery of food.

I'm doomed.

But look! The Manster! A film briefly discussed on this very blog not too long ago!

Maybe being a shut-in won't be so bad after all.

Thursday, June 23, 2005

Quoted at the Scene, a Mr. Nelson said, "HA Ha!"

This story reminds me of that Bugs Bunny cartoon where he and Daffy are competing in a game show for a prize of "1 million bucks," and the prize is revealed to actually be 1 million BOX...Cut to a huge box filled with a million tiny boxes.

Which reminds me--Cartoon Network stopped showing old Looney Tunes cartoons a while back, and that totally bummed me out. Anyone know if they started again? Or if there is another network that does? I'm hoping my digital cable install this weekend will result in SOME classic cartoon watching, preferably of the looney variety.

They're Dead...They're All Messed Up

Lest you forget, George A. Romero's triumphant return to the world of zombies, "Land of the Dead," opens tomorrow!

Here's a short interview with the guy. But don't look at the picture for too long. He's turned into an Old Guy In Enormous Glasses, and it's freakin' me out.

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Cats Throw Awful Parties



I stumbled upon this site today. It's an online library of antique children's books, and some of the illustrations and stories are amazing. And weird. And just plain wrong. I recommend a perusal.

One favorite is The Cats' Party, pictured to the right. Remind me never to accept an invitation to a kitty soiree.

One Froggy Evening

This week's SFist post is up, and all I can say is, umm, do you have frog legs? No no, do you serve them!? NO--do you HAVE THEM?!...uh, YOU'RE STUPID! *click*

Phone the Kids and Wake the Neighbors!

The infamous episode of Cruise (literally) on Oprah will be rerun TOMORROW!

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Stop Makin' Noises Like a Husband

AFI is airing another one of their bloated three-hour movie clips specials tonight at 8pm. This time it's 100 Years...100 Movie Quotes. Go to the link and you can look at the official list of selections that were voted on. The usual suspects (ha! There's one!) are there, but I'm just glad something like "Detour" was even considered (see above).

Also on tonight is the season premiere of Rescue Me at 10pm on F/X. And the premiere of The Real World: Austin, (oy!) also at 10, on MTV.

My Pants Are Stinky

And it's not because I haven't washed them, because I washed them just last night. I think there's something about this brand of jeans that is inherently smelly, (Old Navy men's black jeans). So, apologies to my coworkers. I'm not a dirty person. It's just these jeans. I swear!

I thought I'd Google "clean jeans" to see what came up, and I got this link called "Musthave: clean jeans". It's Dutch. Anyone want to offer a partial translation?

Monday, June 20, 2005

Promises Were Made to Be Broken

I know I promised I'd stop posting about them, but this is just too funny. Be sure to watch the clip.

Also, a friend sent this to me last week and if true, it's a very creepy story.

Thursday, June 16, 2005

These Shoes Suck

I watched 30 Days last night (the premiere will re-run Sunday at 11pm, and perhaps other times--check your guide) and have to say, I loved it. I know Spurlock is getting some flack for partaking in a short-term "experiment"--minimum wage living--that people have to live with every day of their lives, but I still felt it was effective. Sure, following some real "working poor" around for 30 days might have been more honest, but that's not the point of the show...

But what was most frightening to me was that they were living those 30 days in Ohio, where the cost of living is considerably lower than it is in San Francisco (come on--that 350 bucks a month apartment was huge, even if it was in a bad area). How the HELL does any minimum wage worker survive in this town, where one-room apartments START at 1000 a month?

The minimum wage is ridiculous, the fact that it hasn't been raised in almost 10 years is re-DONK-ulous, and the cost of living in this City makes me want to cry. I'll never complain about my job again.

Or, at least until tomorrow.

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Cable Guy

This week's SFist post is up. And it's whiny!

Workshed!


Yes. That's me and Bruce Campbell. Clearly, it was a shocking experience for me (either that, or the two-hours I had to wait in line to get his autograph had finally taken their toll.) He was at the Balboa Theater last night to sign books and introduce his movie The Man With the Screaming Brain, and he was as funny and affable as he always seems to be in interviews and DVD commentaries and everywhere else he's ever popped up. He was so friendly, in fact, that every person who got something signed was allowed to sit down next to him, chat away, and have a picture taken. Which meant the line that was formed around the block crept along at a snail's pace. Bless the Balboa, but I don't think they were near prepared for the numbers of people that showed, because their attempts at crowd control were laughable.

In the end it worked out OK, although MAN is that theater out in the boondocks. Not a part of town where you can walk out and hail a taxi, that's for sure. I had to wander about 10 blocks before stumbling upon a bus that--thankfully--stops a block from my house. Of course, I had to wait 30 minutes for it, and didn't get home until after midnight, (and I was at the EARLY show!) but in the end it was worth it...

Because I met BRUCE FREAKIN' CAMPBELL!

Monday, June 13, 2005

Have You Heard the One About Xenu?

Seriously, I know. Enough with the Katie Holmes-Tom Cruise brouhaha. So she's converting to Scientology. We all saw that coming.

But I do think it should be pointed out that when she was on Letterman last week, she admitted that they've known each other for six weeks.

SIX WEEKS!

Shouldn't they give it, say, two months before making these insane proclamations and conversions?

Also, she couldn't come up with a story about how they met either. What is UP with that?

Friday, June 10, 2005

You Forgot Ugly, Lazy, and Disrespectful

20 years. 20 YEARS?! I can't believe it has been 20 freaking years since The Breakfast Club came out. That means I was only 15 when I saw it. Twice in one week! I think it came out around Valentine's Day, because I have a memory of going with a friend to a Walgreen's by the theater before the show to buy up all the half-off candy. We saw it at the Regency III, which is now Ruby Skye. (It was a really nice little theater and I mourn its loss to this day.) You know, I may have even seen it three times in one week, because I also remember seeing it with my parents, and seeing it on opening night, but I can't remember all the details. All I know is I loved it, and from there on out the theme song, with it's line, "Rain keeps falling, rain keeps falling down," would make me and my friends laugh. Especially when I'd do a HILARIOUS pratfall whenever it played. Good times.

I bring this all up, of course, because of the Breakfast Club "reunion" on the MTV Movie Awards last night. Alas, it wasn't a real reunion since Judd Nelson and Emilio Estevez weren't there, (what's that about?) but it did kind of bring tears to my eyes to see the other three watching the clips and getting teary eyed themselves.

However, I don't know how to take the news that Molly Ringwald is hoping to do a sequel to Sixteen Candles. Will it be called "Thirty-Six Candles"? And will Michael Schoeffling stop building furniture and return to the role of Jake Ryan?

Thursday, June 09, 2005

OK...But Just This ONE Time More

I have to admit I was pretty disappointed with last week's Hit Me Baby One More Time. All of the bands sounded AWFUL (except for Arrested Development, but I think that was just because there were so many of them). Judging from the production value of the show, which looks like something shot in an Eastern Block country during the 80s, I guess I shouldn't have been that surprised by that. But I will be watching at least one more time because The Motels and Vanilla Ice are on tonight's show. I love The Motels! I hate Vanilla Ice!

That's entertainment!

Bino White!...(I Don't Even Know What That Means)

I get the feeling not everyone is watching Beauty and the Geek and that's too bad. I mean, I understand it, but it's too bad. Reality TV burn-out is hard to overcome. But in case people are staying away because they're sick of dating shows, please know that it isn't a dating show. It's a "social experiment", OK? But mainly it's a chance to watch some adorable nerds. I love nerds! And there's a re-run on tonight! At 8! Or maybe 9! So watch it!

Also, Joe's blog, My Blog Is Bigger Than Your Blog, is back online. Poor Joe.

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Shaking My Fist

This week's SFist post is up, and in case you missed them, I also wrote a review of the movie Satan's Playground, and a brief post about Animal Cops San Francisco. Go there now. And God be with you.

Put...the Phone....DOWN

Russell Crowe is scheduled to appear on the Late Show with David Letterman tonight. Let's hope he doesn't need to make a phone call during the show. HA HA HAR!

Warning: Tool Ahead

I don't know why I feel compelled to subject myself to more pain, but I admit it, I will be tuning in to the second season of Blow Out on Bravo. (It premiered last night, but will be repeated. A lot.) As awful as the show is, there's something about the complete tool-ness that is Jonathan that I find completely facinating.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Hey! Look Over There!

I've had to spend time on some SFist posts today, so you might have better luck going over there if it's posts you seek...

Monday, June 06, 2005

Summer TV Makes Me Sad

And happy. Happy sad. Sappy?

Usually, come Saturday I've got a load of TiVo to catch up on, as well as a couple of Netflix movies breathing down my neck, and I spend the rest of the weekend trying to catch up. Most of the time, I make it. But this Saturday I found myself without any good TiVo, and I had already watched two of my three Netflix movies. I was at a loss. So I did something crazy. I turned the TV off (I KNOW!), turned the stereo on, and cracked open a book.

What's happened to me??

I found that just sitting there, reading and listening to music just wasn't enough activity (I wish there was some way to knit while reading...) so I decided to copy some of my old, treasured mix tapes from the 80s and 90s to CD. The only annoying part about that was the average mix tape is 90 minutes long, and I can't find a recordable CD that's longer than 80 minutes (why is that?) so I ended up having to record one tape side per CD. A lot of wasted CD space, but they aren't expensive, so I guess it's no big whoop.

I finished the book I was reading, as well as a play ("The Book of Liz" by Amy and David Sedaris) which compelled me to go to the library to return them and pick up some of the reserves that were waiting for me. So now I have a pile of library books and a limited number of days to finish them. Are books the new TiVo?

Friday, June 03, 2005

It's Friday

And I've got nothing to say. Weather sure is nice, huh? How about the weekend? Sure glad it's coming up...........

*yawn*

I was going to post a link to a "Beauty and the Geek" geek's blog, as I read some of it this morning, and it was kind of funny, but it looks like he's taken it down. Oh well...

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Shriek of the Innocent

I heard a bunny scream today. I was having lunch in South Park amongst the hipsters and dogs, and one girl was getting ready to sit down in the grass with her pet bunny, which she had on a halter leash. A big fluffy dog, not on a leash, caught site of the critter and came bounding over. The bunny freaked out, and got the leash tangled around its neck, and began to frantically try and hop away. Because the leash was around its neck, the girl couldn't just lift the leash and the bunny off the ground, so she was trying to grab the bunny as it continued to hop madly, the dog chasing it, and spinning the girl in circles. She yelled at the dog to stop it, but he was having none of it. Then the rabbit started screaming. I didn't know rabbits could scream! It was really...creepy.

The dog, needless to say, was loving it.

This went on way too long before the dog's owner finally came over and got the dog under control. She offered no apology to the bunny or the bunny's owner as she sat on the grass clutching the terrified critter. It was really sad! I went over and asked if the bunny was OK, and the girl said it was fine, just scared, and that she had never heard it scream like that before, either.

Leashes, people! They aren't just for bunnies! If the park is not a leash-free park, it's not a leash-free park! How simple can you get?

Oh, Christian

You're so classy!

D-Day!

OK. I admit it. I kinda liked Beauty and the Geek. Not since "Joe Millionaire" has a room full of girls been so dim. And the geeks? Wonderfully geeky. One even got a nosebleed. Twice! Seriously, how do you cast for that? That's just too perfect.

Of course they had to throw in the one geek who is actually really cute (Brad), and of course he doesn't even have to spend one night alone before one of the bimbos is crawling into bed with him. And of course he didn't kick her out of bed for being dumb. I found that plotline a little annoying. We need a level playing field here, people!

The best part came at the ending challenge, when two girls were being quizzed on politics. Faced with the question, "Who was President during the Civil War?" the girl replied, "Hoover?" When told that was wrong she said, "Oh, right. D-Day!"

Brilliant.

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Can I Go Home Now?

This week's SFist post is now up. Read it! This is probably all you're gonna get by way of posts today!