Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Watch Out For Those Lightsabers! They'll Take an Eye Out!

Oh brother. George Lucas announced plans to re-release the "Star Wars" films in 3-D come 2007. Because, of course, he'll be BROKE by then, and in desperate need of any money he might be able to bleed from the franchise. Again.

And this time, not only will Greedo shoot first, but he'll shoot at the AUDIENCE! And then Han will be all "Hey, Greedo. Don't be shootin' at the audience, man. Now you really deserve to die." At which point he'll shoot Greedo under the table, and the laser blast will rip past your head, and set off an explosion in the back of the theater.

Because, you know, Han Solo is a GOOD guy.

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