Happy Festivus, Georgie!

"You couldn't smooth a silk sheet if you had a hot date with a babe...I lost my train of thought."

Happy Get a Life Day!

Here's the thing: I LOVED "Star Wars" when it came out in 1977. Loved. And I loved it in 1978. In fact, the movie must have still been showing in theaters then because I know I had a birthday party that was primarily an excuse to see "Star Wars" again with a bunch of friends, and that would have been in January of '78...

Which is why I find it so puzzling that I have absolutely no memory of watching the infamous "Star Wars Holiday Special" when it aired in 1978. Did I just not know about it? We had a TV, and I know I was watching a lot of it at that age, so it seems odd that I wouldn't have heard about it. Did I actually see it, and block it completely out of my memory because the awfulness of it was so traumatic? Did my parents keep its existence a secret because they knew if would be awful, or, more likely, because there was something else on at that time that they wanted to watch?

I may never know. But part of me is glad I missed it as a kid--or forgot about it completely--because I think it might have permanently tainted my "Star War" love had I seen it, and that was something that I'm grateful didn't happen until the prequels were released. (Well, OK, it kind of began to happen towards the end of "Return of the Jedi," but let's pretend it didn't.)

Regardless, I'm happy it's relatively easy to watch these days, even if the video quality is for crap. Happy Life Day, everyone!

Are There No Prisons? Are There No Workhouses?

I got laid off on Tuesday. I wasn't the only one. Perhaps you read about it? Yes, just in time for Christmas. Ironically, the last time I was laid off, from a different job, was also right before the holidays. What's up with that?

So, that has cast a little pall over the season, but I am doing my best to just appreciate the fact that I have some time off, and am not a few dollars away from living on the street.

Still, it's tough. I ain't gonna lie.

But enough about that! Here's some bitter Christmas fun!

All I Want For Christmas Is Paul Rudd

Just stuff him in my stocking, OK Santa?

SANTAH!

Marinate It Overnight In the Tears of a Heartbroken Leprechaun

"The Simpsons" aired its Christmas special this past Sunday. Some of it was good, and some of it was not so good. Below is my favorite bit, featuring guest star Martha Star.

And That's What the War On Christmas Is All About, Charlie Brown

Holiday special alert! "A Charlie Brown Christmas" is on ABC at 8 P.M. tonight! Do watch.

And here's a related Christmas clip from last night's "Daily Show." Do watch.

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The Gretch Who Saved the War on Christmas
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Little Boots!

Happy Sinterklass Day, the freakish Christmas tradition of my peoples! Actually, the big party was last night, Sinterklaasavond, but whatever.

If you haven't read David Sedaris's take on it, what the hell? Do it.

And, per usual...

I Love a Good Bunny Hunt

Maybe one of these years I'll have the energy to do a daily Christmas post kind of thing, like the Halloween countdown. But not this year! Alas...

Still, I'll try to provide SOME occasional merriment. Like this clip from the dearly departed "Bonnie Hunt Show," in which she interviews my Muppet boyfriend Pepe the King Prawn. I hope you like it okay.

In-deee-pen-dent

In case you didn't get the memo, in the form of my weekly "Hey Watch It!" post on the SFGate Culture Blog, here's another reminder: "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" is on tonight at 8 P.M. on CBS! No word on whether this version will include some never-before-seen scenes...



But that's not all! Also on tonight is "Dr. Seuss's How the Grinch Stole Christmas!" at 8 P.M. on ABC!

Happy Festivus!

I've got a lot of problems with you people, and now you're gonna hear about it!

Well, maybe later. As much as I'd like to believe there's got to be a better way, I still need to go out and do some last minute Christmas shopping. But believe me, if anyone tries to come between me and a coveted doll, I will RAIN BLOWS UPON HIM.

A Christmas Miracle!

Last year, I bemoaned the fact that I could not find video of Cher's version of "O Holy Night," which has become infamous due to Paul Shaffer's yearly rendition on "Late Show With David Letterman."

Well, my prayers have been answered. Watch the song, among others, in the medley below. Indeed, she does have her hands in a muff, but she is not alone under a street lamp, as Shaffer often describes. Instead, she is surrounded by extras similarly dressed in awful 70s versions of Victorian garb. Which is, of course, AWESOME.

You Need My Nutmeg

There are very few recent Christmas specials that deserve yearly viewings. But "A Colbert Christmas" is an exception. It's required viewing every year.

Unfortunately, Comedy Central seems to be waging a war against Christmas as the only time the special will be airing this coming week is at 2:30am late, late Christmas Eve.

F' that! Watch it right here ANY TIME YOU WANT.

It Was Loaded, and Exploded

Here's a Christmas carol for you. Here it is now.



[via Boing Boing]

6 2 8

A belated Merry Sinterklaasavond to everyone! I hope no one gets carted off to Spain!

Let's sing, shall we?

Christmastime Is Here, Happiness and Cheer

If you read my daily posts on the SFGate Culture Blog, I'll be listing a lot of Christmas specials in the coming week. But if you don't (and why is that, exactly?!) here's a handy list of what's coming up this week.

Monday: "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" at 8 P.M. on ABC.

Tuesday: "The Year Without a Santa Claus" at 7 P.M. on ABC Family, and "A Charlie Brown Christmas" at 8 P.M. on ABC. Edited to add: Tonight's Obama speech means you'll have to wait two weeks for "Charlie Brown." It will air on December 15th.

Wednesday: "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer" at 8 P.M. on CBS.

But that's all you'll get from me right now. Check the Culture Blog every day for more!

And here's a clip from "Rudolph" to tide you over. (Spoiler alert! Major plot point revealed in this clip!!!!!)

O Holy Nighyot

Paul Shaffer did his annual impression of Cher singing "O Holy Night" on last night's Letterman. Here's a clip from 2006...



I'm dying to find a video clip of the actual performance to see if she actually does have her hands in a muff, but so far, I haven't been able to track it down. You can hear the song, though, so here it is! Have a great Christmas!

Love, Pizza, Meatballs

Tonight's episode of "Late Show with David Letterman" is his annual Christmas show, in which a pizza and a meatball are placed atop the Christmas tree, a football is tossed at it, and Darlene Love sings what is easily my favorite Christmas song "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)"...I love tradition.

Here's a clip from 2006's episode.

Festivus Yes! Bagels No!

Today is Festivus, and if I had the time, I'd air my grievances. But I don't, because I have to go out and rain blows upon anyone who gets in my way during last-minute Christmas shopping. Just know that I have made a contribution in all your names to the Human Fund. You're welcome.

Also, if you'd like to watch the original "Seinfeld" episode it all started with, it's on at 7:30 tonight on channel two. A Festivus miracle!

No You May Not Have a Flexy the Pocket Monkey!

I can't say where this clip is from because if I do, it might get taken down. So I'll just say that this little bit was a favorite when I was kid, and for whatever reason, it was never included when the episode it was on aired in re-runs.

So here it is, after many, many years, my Christmas gift to you!


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Go Tell It On the...*zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz*

I realize not everyone was as enraptured as I was by the Faith Hill "Little Drummer Boy" clip I posted a while back. So be it. But I don't think anyone can deny the power of this version of "Go Tell It On the Mountain."



[via Videogum]