The Line-Up

For those without TiVo or TiFauxs, note that "30 Rock" has been moved to a new time, swapping with "Scrubs." So, "30 Rock" is now at 9:30 and "Scubs" is now at 8:30.

Got it?

Good.

Also, there's a new episode of "Lost" tonight as well, and it's also moved times. It's now on at 10pm, which I'm kind of annoyed by. Not because it's late and I'm old and I'll fall asleep (although, who am I kidding, that's bound to happen) but because I've been enjoying the season so much, having to wait until 10 to see a new episode is a bit of torture in my primetime line-up.

What?!

Brought To You By the Old AT&T

Kind of a "Lost" spoiler ahead, so warning if you haven't watched tonight's episode yet...

But I knew he was dead the minute I saw his cell phone. Just like I knew the "flashbacks" in the final episode of season three were flash-forwards the minute I saw Jack's cell phone. And I think the show has officially used up all of its cell phone-based clues from here on out.

I think some people are complaining that the whole flash-forward, flashback mixaroo and reveal at the end was nothing but a huge gimmick, and perhaps it was. But it was saved by Yunjin Kim's performance at the gravesite. It had me crying like a stunt baby covered in strawberry jam.

So, I assume Aaron is officially one of the Oceanic Six, then? Not sure I like that. Alas, next week is the final episode we can expect for a while, and it looks to feature a lot of Michael, which I'm not too happy about. I just wonder if Taller Walt is wandering around that boat somewhere...

It's Like He KNOWS Me!

Here's something almost clever from the official "Lost" Web site: a Sawyer Nickname Generator. Answer a few questions about youself, and it'll spit out Sawyer's official nickname for you. Mine was "Betty," which, all nicknames considered, wasn't that bad. Try it! And tell me your nickname!

Lost Is Found

Don't forget: tonight's the season premiere of "Lost" on ABC. But don't be fooled. It's not a two-hour premiere like the network would like you to think it is. The first hour, at 8pm, is just a recap show; the actual season premiere is at 9pm. I suppose there's a chance they'll put some goodies in the recap, but I've watched some of those recap eps in the past, and they've always proved to be kind of boring if you have any memory of what's been going on in the series. But then again, it's been eight months since last season, so maybe a recap isn't such a bad idea.

Also, did you watch the rerun of season three finale last night? How annoying were those pop up "facts" they threw in there? "Ben draws a mean triangulated map...and speaking of triangles, there's a mean love triangle going on between Jack, Sawyer, and Kate."

Uh-Oh. Jin's In Trouble!

What is up with "Lost" cast members and their uncontrollable need to drink and drive?

When Did You Know?

I knew the minute he whipped out that Razr phone...

Pay No Attention to the--OH MY GOD!

If you missed that glimpse of Jacob in last night's episode of "Lost" I suggest you go back and watch it again.

And then come back here and explain to me WHO THE HELL HE IS!

The End Is Nigh

ABC announced that "Lost" will end in 2010, which sure sounds like a long ways away, but maybe that's just because I don't want to admit that come 2010, I will be 40.

The show will have three more shorter seasons, which means no more of that lame six episodes and then a long break and then the rest of the season crap. I guess the general hope is now that the writers have a definite time line in sight, they will be able to pace the show better, and maybe come up with some episodes that don't feel like they're just pulling stories out of their asses.

Which is not to say I feel they've been doing that recently--I've liked the past couple of episodes--but I'd have to call the majority of this season a failure.

You Bastards!

I was incredibly bored by last night's "Lost," and I'm not entirely sure why.

I was hopeful during it's first few minutes when --SPOILER ALERT!--Charlie got that arrow through the neck. But then it turned out to be a fake-out, so it was really NOT A SPOILER, and I groaned and the episode went on, and I found myself staring at my toenails, realized they had gotten a little too long, so I trimmed them, and that was a lot more exciting than anything that was going on on screen.

But maybe that's just me.

Gabba, Gabba, We Accept You

What I liked about this week's episode of "Lost":

-- Finding out why the others kidnapped Claire and what the hell was up with the injections.

-- Learning that Juliet was NOT bumping uglies with Ben.

-- Evil Juliet.

What I didn't like:

-- That we might not actually know why the Others kidnapped Claire and injected her with stuff; it could all be part of Juliet's lie.

-- Jack's continued stubborn ignorance.

-- That Claire did NOT die.

I've Got to Go Save Jack...Again!

I'm not going to complain about this episode, lest I bother some people, so I will just say that I welcomed the return of the smoke monster, but was initially nervous when Juliet acted like she had never heard of or seen the thing before. Needless to say, I was relieved when she fessed up to the lying about that. One thing, though: Couldn't the monster just, I don't know, float OVER the sonic fence?

So...where did the Others go? And why? And if they've abandoned camp, shouldn't all the Losties just move on in?

Nice Working With You, Billy Dee

I know a lot of people hate last night's episode of "Lost," (although there are some who, oddly enough, love it.) I thought it was fun, if a little bit of a buzzkill after last week's Daddy in a box episode. They really know how to stop excitement in its tracks, don't they?

While I could get upset with the show's continuing to introduce new characters just to kill them off, I won't. (Plus, Locke telling Paolo things don't stay buried on the island leads me to believe perhaps they, or at least one of them, might survive.) But I WILL complain about that scene in the TV hatch with Ben and Juliet. What the hell? Did he drag her all the way over there just to show her a little bit of video of Jack? And did he really need to deliver such clumsy exposition? I thought it would have been a lot more interesting if the stuff they said to each other only made sense to us and not Paolo since we have the benefit of hindsight (or would that be foresight?). It also would have been a little more plausible that Paolo would then choose not to risk telling anyone about being in that hatch since he didn't really understand what those two were planning anyway.

Anyway... Next week: Cat fight!

Step 2: Put a Total Dick In a Box

So, this week's "Lost" was both awesome, and slightly dissapointing. On the awesome side, the ultimate realization that Locke is basically batshit crazy with island worship, so much so that he will do anything to totally trap everyone on that damned island forever. He really doesn't want to get back in that wheelchair, yo.

On the sorta lame side, the revelation of how he was actually paralyzed, although at this point I think anything would have been a dissapointment; we've been waiting three years for the answer. I just never thought it would be as simple as him being thrown out a window by his father. Which of course isn't exactly "simple," but in the world of "Lost" it kind of is. Also, I sure hope that box Ben spoke of is a metaphorical one, and not some actual giant magic box guarded by David Blaine.

I appreciated the answer to a lot of little questions this episode; that, indeed, the Others could come and go as they pleased, at least at some point. That Locke's dad is the original Sawyer. And some others that I'm too tired to remember. However, I hope this concentration on smaller questions doesn't mean they'll lose focus on the bigger questions, including: WHAT THE HELL WAS UP WITH THOSE DUDES IN THE ANTARCTIC?

Touchdown!

Last night's "Lost" redeemed some of the problems I had with last week's episode, mainly that Locke is less a bumbling idiot who can't stop pushing any buttons he sees, and more of a calculating asshole who has something bigger up his sleeve. Is it that he wants to sabotage ANY ability to contact the outside world because he never wants to leave the island? (The whole "island gave him his legs back" thing.) Or is it that he's some kind of super duper sleeper agent working for some Dharma or anti-Dharma agency?

I've been dreading the big Jack-and-Claire-are-siblings reveal for a while, mainly because it seems such a soap opera, "OK, let's throw that in there too!" thing, and not like something they were planing from the beginning. But I guess it went as well as could be expected. I don't like that during Claire's first flashback, with the fortune teller and the pregnancy, there was no mention of her having a mother in a coma. Sometimes I wish the writers were forced to stick to all the pieces they laid out in season one, and not throw in things that weren't mentioned back then.

Finally, that last shot of Jack running for his life and catching a football? Was all kinds of awesome.

When Will They Learn That No Good Can Come From Button Pushing?

I'm beginning to think the Others have a point with trying to keep those damn Losties away from them. They're like a bunch of three-year-olds that can't keep stop touching touching touching everything they see. And occasionally putting things in their mouths. Maybe all this torture stuff the Others are partaking in is just to make sure the Losties don't get to their village and accidentally burn all their houses down.

Which isn't to say I didn't like this episode. I thought it was pretty solid. But I guess I'll have to wait until morning to read a translation of what was said between Miss Klugh and Bakunin.

Edited to add: According to the Lostpedia, this is the what they said, poorly translated as it is:

Klugh: Mikhail. Mikhail! You know what to do.
Mikhail: We still have another way [out].
Klugh: We cannot risk. You know the conditions.
Mikhail: There is another way.
Klugh: They captured us. We will not let them to get into territory.
Klugh: You know what to do. It is an order.
Mikhail: We still have another way!
Klugh (in English): Just do it, Mikhail.
Mikhail: Forgive me. (shoots)

Has ABC's Marketing Department Been Fired Yet?

According to them, we all just HAD to watch last night's episode of "Lost" or else we'd all be wondering what everyone was talking about the next day.

Apparently I missed that bit in last night's show. Please. Enlighten me.

What's the Chinese Character for "Meh"?

After last week's episode of "Lost," which was kind of fun and intriguing, we are back to another damned Jack flashback. I don't want any more Jack flashbacks unless they involve him fighting dragons or revealing he was once a woman. Shit is played, yo.

How can anyone cast Bai Ling in anything resembling a serious role anymore? Perhaps it was a budgeting decision as it's obvious she brought her own wardrobe to the set.

Finally, I wouldn't fuck with sheriff Isabel, Jack. She had a tough mother, and if I know one thing about her, it is this: She is not. One of your FANS!

Finally, a Plot Development I Can Get Behind

Talking "Lost" here. Spoiler-phobes beware.

First: Charlie's going to die?

YAAAAAAY!!!!

If they actually come through on that promise, I may be able to forgive a lot of the show's missteps this season.

Also, who's giving out haircuts on the island, and when did Claire decide to get herself some bangs?

There were a lot of movie references in Desmond's...flashback? Lifeflash? I caught the "Out of Sight" necktie throwdown, and a bit of "Somewhere in Time" with his going to see the professor. Other sites have pointed out some allusions to "The Wizard of Oz" (red shoes and the crushing thereof) and "Frequency" (a sporting event being used to prove time travel). Any others? And any ideas why?

Sound and Fury Signifying...Huh?

Popwatch posted this video of the brainwashing scene from last week's "Lost" being played backwards. In it a voice is heard saying, "Only fools are enslaved by time and space," which is one of those quotes that sounds all profound and meaningful until you realize it's nothing but another damn cryptic clue we can just throw on the pile with the rest.