Speaking of Coconuts

Lost premieres at 8:00 on ABC, and I'm excited. While it might at first sound like nothing more than a "dramatic" version of "Gilligan's Island," (plane crash survivors stranded on a deserted island) I have faith it will be much more than that, mainly because it's from the creative mind of J.J. Abrams, the guy behind Alias. He cares not for stories that "make sense" or "are believable" and I love him for it. Word has it there's more on this island than sand, and more to these survivors than they are willing to reveal.

AND one of them is a HOBBIT!

C'mon. What else are you going to watch before the premiere of another insufferable season of The Bachelor?

Flash a Boob in His Honor

By which I mean, don't flash someone you think is a boob, but flash one of YOUR boobs, if you've got 'em.

Oh, never mind.

Russ Meyer died. Read Roger Ebert's tribute.

She Can Do a Hell of a Lot With a Coconut

I don't care if Mark Burnett has anything to with it or not. I want Martha Stewart back on my TV! Now! No one wields a glue gun like her, and the Holidays are just not going to be the same without her there to tell me how to tie the perfect bow!

I'm PACKING It!!

Will the decidedly Hulkish Colin and the road-ragin' Christie take home the million bucks tonight on the "Amazing Race" finale?

Good God, I hope not.

As for the other finalists, the Moms are a little too shrill, and the Christian models are a little too...Christian model, I guess. So I'm rooting for Chip and Kim. And I will be screaming and on the edge of my seat for the entire duration of the two-hour finale, you can count on that. (Starts at 9! On CBS!)

Here's a good article about the show, and why some people (you know who you are) continue to think of the "Amazing Race" as the "spinach" of reality programs.

"I Want It To Be the Way I Want It To Be"

I'm not going to go off on another "Star Wars" geek rant about the DVD release of the "original" three movies. It's all been said before. But I just can't get over some of the comments George Lucas makes in this CNN interview. He sounds like a spoiled 9-year. (Or young Annakin. Take your pick.)

"They're MY movies!! I should have it MY way!"

He just. Doesn't. Get it.

Is He Anything?

John Kerry is scheduled to appear on Letterman tonight. I'm kind of hoping he'll actually show some personality, and will talk about some important issues, because man. He's got to get that ball rolling soon! Of course I know the election won't be won or lost depending on his ability to woo the viewers of late night talk shows, but at least that's an arena Bush will most likely not enter...

Cocaine's a Hell of a Drug!

Reports of Rick James' death from natural causes were....a little exaggerated.

Wake Me If James Gandolfini Starts Eating People

For someone who watches so much TV, I have surprisingly little interest in the Emmy Awards. I'm not sure why that is, as I get ecstatic over the Oscars. Maybe it's because I really don't give a crap about what actor is going to take home a statue for best performance in a TV movie. Or maybe it's the lack of really BIG stars. (Yeah. I said it. Movie stars are bigger than TV stars.) Or maybe it's the sheer predictability of the event. ("The West Wing" won again? *Yawn.* Is that a "Soprano" clutching an award? *Snore.*) Whatever it is, I'm pretty sure I won't be glued to the set this Sunday.

Although the potential for some good fashion disasters does hold promise...

Now I Guess I'll Have to Tell 'em That I Got No Cerebellum

Johnny Ramone died. I think I'm gonna cry...

My most memorable Ramones experience was seeing them at Wolfgang's a week after having BRAIN SURGERY when I was a teenager. I stood right in front of the stage. And it was awesome.

Read one of Johnny's last interviews with Rolling Stone

My Ox Is BROKEN!

I just can not express to you how much I am loving The Amazing Race right now. Last night's episode had my cheering, and guffawing, and screaming "NOOOOOOOO!" more than I have for anything I've watched in my entire life. And I was into football once! Seeing a contestant I had once admired, and now loath with a passion, reduced to a simpering mass being drug around a mud field by an ox that couldn't care less was one of the most satisfying viewing experiences of my life.

I can say with no hesitation that there is no other show on TV right now, reality or otherwise, that's better. And while it saddens me that the finale is next week, I am happy that I will not have to wait another year for the new season, which will most likely premiere in November.