Please Won't You Not Be My Neighbor?

I have some loud neighbors. REALLY loud neighbors. After living above a Chinese family for the past 10 years or so that never shouted, played loud music, or even seemed to own a TV set, this came as kind of a shock. Especially after I realized my new neighbors were a couple of lesbians that really, really, really like to have loud sex. A LOT. And being that these are two women, it goes on for hours. The moaning and screaming just goes on and on. I can't begin to think what the neighbors below them are thinking, especially since one of those neighbors is a certifiably insane old woman who has a tendency to stand outside our apartment building just staring into space waiting for someone to let her in. I fear all this will push her over the edge and she'll end up burning the entire place down, "Jane Eyre" style.

Anyway, I always thought all those female sexual histronics were for the benefit of the male partner. When it's two women, do they really need to go on like that?

And they aren't just loud when it comes to their sex lives, they're loud about everything. They are constantly playing loud music, screaming, and laughing; they are incapable of having a quiet conversation. I just don't understand this. Do they really not realize that when they have loud conversations with their windows open (our apartments' bathroom and kitchen windows open up into a common shaft that is shared with one entire half of the building) that everyone can hear every word? Or are they so self-absorbed that they don't even notice?

Well, today the two lovers had a huge fight. One accused the other of cheating, and screams that included the lines, "I fucking love you! I've even thought about marrying you!," "You are who I think about when I go to sleep, and when I wake up in the morning!," and "I fell in love with you, and I'm sorry for that. No...I'm not sorry for that, I mean, it's been hard!," were shouted for the enjoyment of all. Almost all of the fight could be heard without me lying on the ground with my ear pressed to the floor. After about 15 minutes of door slamming, one threatening to walk out on the other, and lots of swearing, the whole thing lost its novelty, and all I could do was hope that they DO break up so we could all get some peace and quiet.

And another part of me is just dreading, with every fiber of my being, their inevitable make-up sex.