Do You Know What It Means, to Miss New Orleans?

It's kind of hard to think about TV when a city I love as much as New Orleans is sitting under water. But seeing all the horrible images and hearing all the stories does keep reminding me of an episode of Nova I saw not too long ago about hurricanes. They focused on New Orleans and its "soup bowl" structure, and how the city is protected, albeit precariously, by levees and pumps. You can watch the entire segment here..

I also really like this story from the New York times called "Where Living at Nature's Mercy Had Always Seemed Worth the Risk" (you need to register to read it) that discusses the city's spirit and just why it is loved by so many. I think there's some similarity to San Francisco in that anyone who lives here or there knows that one day, by earthquake or hurricane (or flood), all that we know and love about the city we live in, could be gone in an instant.

America Rules

Let me tell you, when Janelle got that phone call from Michael Tuesday night, and the bitterness amongst the friendship began, I was a little scared that we Americans may have screwed up and caused Janelle's ultimate eviction.

Luckily, that didn't happen. So now I can just bask in the glow of Ivette's tears.

Oh man. When April called all the "Big Brother" fans "pieces of shit," and started questioning the character of all the people that voted for Janelle to get that phone call, well, at that moment I was the proudest I've ever been to be an American.

Heimlich...

I was exchanging emails with a friend last week when she mentioned that a friend of her husband's had died suddenly in a car crash, and he was having a tough time dealing with the news. It wasn't until I opened this week's issue of "Entertainment Weekly" that I realized the friend she was talking about was Joe Ranft, a story artist at Pixar. He also provided voices for some of the films, my favorite being Heimlich from "A Bug's Life." I never met him, but from what I've heard from people who worked with him, he was a hell of a guy, and I'm sure he will be greatly missed...

Battle of the Network Famewhores

Here's why Bravo's Battle of the Network Reality Stars is lame.

First, the best thing about the original "Battle of the Network Stars" was that it took TV stars and put them into a situation that was so obviously not their element. Sure, it also provided fans with an opportunity to see their favorite stars in nipple-accentuating swimsuits and ball-baring Speedos, but I think the real draw was the potential to see famous people totally embarrass themselves on national TV. (Or totally surprise us by doing the complete opposite. GABE KAPLAN.)

This new version places "stars" (let's not get started on that) into situations that, for the majority of the teams' players, are old news. Most of these people got their fame by competing in relatively lame physical competitions, and really, do we need to see Richard Hatch running another obstacle course? I don't think so.

Which leads to the obvious idea of creating a new version of "Battle" that, once again, features real stars.

I don't think it would be nearly as fun.

Let's face it. Stars today are a hell of a lot healthier and fitter than they were in the 70s and 80s, and that negates the whole "looking foolish" fun of the show. I suppose watching the "King of Queens" cast racing around the track could be good for a laugh, sure, but then Jennifer Garner would just com speeding up behind them (while 8 months pregnant, no less!) and *yawn,* there's "Alias" winning ANOTHER competition.

Stab You! Stab You! Stab You! Stab You!

I'm a little late to the party, but I have to say that MTV2's Wonder Showzen is one of the funniest things I've seen on TV in a long time.

While the whole "kids show that's really for adults" thing isn't that original an idea, I think "Wonder Showzen" really pushes it to a whole new level. It's like TV Funhouse on crack, heroin, and speed. Battling a hangover. While suffering a schizophrenic breakdown.

In a word: Awesome.

Cable TV, Take Me Awaaaaaay!

This week's (AND last week's, as this week's can probably count as last week's) SFist post is up!

Oh how I wish I was home in front of the TV right now.

Will It Take My Final For Me Too?

This is the book I need to get for my photography class.

It's EIGHTY DOLLARS!!!

I haven't paid 80 bucks for a single book in my entire life. I haven't even paid 80 bucks for a single DVD, and I tend to splurge on those.

I really don't understand why text books have to be so expensive. There's gotta be some kind of conspiracy behind it. Headed by the same guys who overprice prescription drugs, and raise the price of gas.

....goddamn George Bush....

I Stink at My Job. Literally.

I always swore I'd never talk about work on this blog, because, first, it's a pretty boring topic, and second, it's pretty universally known that it's a bad idea. Books have been written about it. So, aside from the occasional, "Sorry there are no posts today, but I'm really busy," posts, it's not a topic for discussion. But the thing is, I've been working so much these past couple of weeks, I really don't have anything else TO talk about.

My day-to-day work has gotten more demanding, and I've also suddenly found out I have to manage the workflow of 10 temps (with even more coming next week, for a possible total of 20). Have I been promoted? Have I gotten a raise? Well, that would be a big fat "NO." But somehow, I've taken on the role of "manager," without any of the added benefits (namely, money).

And the thing is, I've never strived to be management. I've never wanted that. I like having a particular job and doing it. I don't want to be responsible for other people. It's frustrating. And after all, EVERYONE can't be a manager,

But you know what? I'm good at it. I was thrown into this project, which was started without me with no rhyme or reason, and I was able to get it organized. Wrote up an actual training document. Put together a spreadsheet that TRACKS who is doing what, and what progress they've made. Gave all the temps assignments, and planned ahead for the new temps coming next week.

It was a lot of work. And it TOOK ME ALL DAY.

And it's NOT MY JOB!

But the most troubling part of it all is I had to run around all day, up and down stairs, training the temps; giving them new assignments when they'd finished. And in the process, I got kind of sweaty. And I think, a little stinky. So I just felt horrible every time I had to go talk to one, worrying that my odor was just overwhelming them, and that they'd actually just pretend they were still busy, just to avoid having to call me and tell me they needed a new assignment.

So, if any of them have Googled my name and found this: I apologize. I know I was a little smelly, and I will do my best to stay cool and wear plenty of deodorant next week.

And if any of my bosses should read this: I want more money. Or else I'll make sure to get REALLY sweaty every day, and move my desk right next to yours.

Because She Can't Phone Her Dog

OK...I need your help again. The evil "Friendship" on "Big Brother" has to learn how much America hates them. So if you could, please go to this link and vote for the buxom blonde, Janelle, to get a phone call. I'm picking her because I think it's funny that the person she wants a call from is someone she met in the house (a guy who the "Friendsheep" accused of sexual molestation. Idiots.) Or, if you hate buxom blondes, let Howie get a phone call. Or, if you love Republicans, vote for James. But do NOT vote for anyone else. They are EVIL! EEEEVIIILLL!!

Many thanks.

Am I a CLOWN to You?

As I was walking to class tonight (only to find out the class has been moved to Monday nights, which means I trekked all the way out to the SFSU campus for NOTHING!) a woman stopped me and said, "Wow! You've really put yourself together well. I LOVE the look!"

At first, after the "You've really put yourself together well" comment, I thought she might have mistaken me for a former classmate. A classmate that had, perhaps, had an obvious drinking problem, and this woman was impressed in seeing her in clean clothes. Or, perhaps she was just surprised to see someone like me (whatever THAT might mean) in a something besides sweats. But it was the "love the look" comment, and the way she said it, that made me realize she wasn't mistaking me for someone else, and she was just commenting on my choice of dress and shoes.

Obviously, what she said didn't make me feel good. It made me feel self-conscious, and it made me start to think that perhaps my choice of clothing looks more like a costume than...clothing. And if that's the case, is that just the fashion equivalent of walking around in, say, a shiny, polka dot jumper and clown shoes?

And then I saw a fellow student with Cosmo Kramer hair, wearing Swifty Lazar sunglasses, a pale blue polyester shirt, huge green bell-bottom cords, and pointy brown Beatle boots, and I decided, as far as costumes go, at least mine MATCHES!

Nope. Nothing to See There.

This is the time of day when I usually link to my weekly SFist post. I'm sorry to break it to everyone, but there won't be a post today. Work and school were making it tougher for me to get to it on Wednesdays, so it'll be appearing on Mondays instead. That way I can devote time to it over the weekend. So, just think of this week's post as not appearing until next Monday. Breathe deeply. Everything's going to be fine.

Meanwhile, in honor of some recent conversations I've had about "Arrested Development," here's an interview with Jessica Walter, the actress who plays the family matriarch, Lucille. (Not to be confused with the Loose Seal that ate Buster's hand, or with Lucille 2, who is played by Liza Minnelli.)

Do You Know What That's Worth?

I'm not going to pretend I'm not a little excited about the movie Just Like Heaven. When they're done well, I'm a sucker for a romantic comedy. The director, Mark Waters did "Mean Girls," which was pretty good. (And his brother Daniel directed "Heathers" which was "Mean Girls," but better.) Plus, it was shot in San Francisco.

Oh, yeah. And some guy named Mark Ruffalo is in it.

*Sigh*....Rooooofalo.

Under Over Some More

Work is kicking me in the ass today, hence this first post at 5:30pm! Yippee.

At some point I will have something to say about the "Six Feet Under" finale, but for those not afraid of spoilers HBO has posted some character obituaries

She Wasn't On Drugs. It Was Just All Those Crazy Pregnancy Hormones.

You know, I just can't get over how fucking crazy Courtney Love really is. Not only has she been sent back to rehab but she's also claiming to be pregnant by actor Steve Coogan. And if any of this sounds familiar (the understatement of the century when it comes to Courtney Love), maybe that's because she made similar claims a year ago when she was facing prison time.

She's gone from amusing-crazy, to tragic-crazy, to just plain tiresome-crazy. She should just go into seclusion for a few years, where she'll either get better, or come out of it just as crazy. But at least by that time we'll have forgotten about her and maybe we'll be able to find her amusing-crazy again.

Under Over

Here's a good interview with Peter Krause, the actor who played Nate on "Six Feet Under." It sounds like he agrees with a lot of criticism I've had with the show, to wit:

"I was frustrated, you know, at a certain point," Krause confides. "There were certain things that happened in the series that I didn't buy...I don't know how many times somebody has to get whacked upside the back of the head to become at least a little bit enlightened."

Exactly.

Busto!

I've recently come to realize that reality shows are my version of sports-watching. At one time I could get excited about football (when I was about 16) and baseball (for a few years while I was in my 20s) but these days I couldn't give a puffy rat's ass.

So, instead, I let myself get super-worked up about dumb reality shows, suffering the exhilarating highs (Kaysar comes back!) and crushing lows (Kaysar comes back! And totally blows it by giving away HOH!) that are probably familiar feelings for Monday night football fans and the like.

So, yeah, there were some absolute screams of joy last night, when after Kaysar was voted out, Janelle won the HOH competition, and was immediately able to put two of the despicable "Friendship" players on the block. Sweet! THIS is how I like my spectator sports to be. Full of buxom blondes and catty name-calling.

Any other "Big Brother" fans out there should be sure to read TVGasm's recap. As always!

You're a BAD Thing

The cast of the Martha Stewart version of "The Apprentice" has been revealed!

OK, they look like a pretty boring lot, but I'm still excited about the show.

Are We There Yet? I Have to Go to the Bathroom!

The next season of "The Amazing Race," as you may have already heard, will feature teams of "families." Meaning, there will be kids racing this season. And while many of the past seasons had racers that certainly acted like children, I still prefer that to the real thing.

But, of course, I'll still be watching.

More here.

Depressing

I'm under the weather today, so what would be more appropriate than an SFist post that talks about death?

Oh Sweet Merciful Jesus

Rachael just sent me this, and all I can say is, thanks for the nightmares.

...hold me....

Train Wreck

I'm not sure why I put myself through it, but I did watch the Comedy Central Roast of Pamela Anderson, and it was...not very funny. Mainly, I watched it to see if Courtney Love was as awful as everyone has said she was, and...she was. Oh man, she was. Unfortunately she was seated right next to Pamela, so she's CONSTANTLY on screen, and she is totally like the too-drunk friend at a party that has to comment loudly about everything anyone says, and also feels the need to lift her shirt many times for no real reason. And scream that she's been sober for a year.

THAT kind of friend.

I think my Courtney-loving days are finally over.

For some scary, close-up photos of Pamela, be sure to check out The Superficial

Even More Flickery

Just last night I was thinking "Wouldn't it be cool if there was a video site like Flickr, where you could upload those goofy little movies you take with your digital camera, and where anyone could come and watch them and comment on them?"

And then this morning I came across YouTube, and it seems to be that exact thing. Wow. I didn't know I had the power to create Web sites with my MIND!

So, I uploaded a little video that was actually shot by my friend Chuck while we were in Las Vegas for our friend Jess's wedding. I give you: Monty!

"Meme"? Is That Anything Like "Mime"?

After reading Jessica's "idiosyncratic" post I found that she had passed a "meme" on to me. First, I checked my glands to make sure they weren't swollen, and then it began to dawn on me that a "meme" wasn't a virus. Then I had to go to Wikipedia in the hopes that they could explain the whole "meme" thing to me. And God bless 'em, the entry is exhaustive, but not a big help. So then I read a few more and realized it's kind of like a chain letter--and I got mad. But then I realized that there wasn't the whole "if you don't do this, bad luck will befall you" evil attached to it, and I figure I'd go ahead and join in.

So my five idiosyncrasies are:

1. I actually do believe in that chain-letter-bad-luck nonsense, so please don't ever, EVER forward one to me, or else I will just send it back to you 100 times. Thanks.

2. I feel sorry for inanimate things. Like stuffed animals. I can't just toss a stuffed animal in the trash, because that makes me feel guilty and sad, and unless I can be there to witness a child picking one of my old stuffed animals out and buying it at a thrift store, I have a hard time giving them away to charity, too. So, instead, they sit around my apartment gathering dust and mites, while I feel guilty about ignoring them. So, much like the request above, please don't give me stuffed animals.

3. I have to get out of bed on the right side, or else I fear bad things will befall me that day.

4. Unlike Jess, I don't mind lotion on my hands, as long as it's rubbed in well, but I can not, even for a few seconds, stand to have sticky hands. Jam hands? Ick. If I eat a piece of fruit, or a pastry (pastries are the worst), I prefer to eat them with a fork, just to avoid getting stickiness on my hands. I really should walk around with Wetty Naps on my person at all times.

5. Me and my cat have a routine wherein after I wake up in the morning, she moves from the bed to the couch and waits for me to make my bed, afterwhich she returns to the bed, lies down and stretches out, then stands up, waiting for me to come by and push her over (in a nice way) while I say, in an embarrassingly high voice, "You're SO CRAZY!" and then I toss her her favorite toys and she goes nuts for about five minutes, then she gets bored and goes back to sleep.

And if that doesn't make me sound like an idiosyncratic crazy cat lady, I don't know what will.

So now I'm supposed to "Tag, you're it!" someone else, right? I don't think many people who read my blog actually have blogs of their own, so I'm kind of at a loss. If anyone wants to share their insanity in the comments, they are welcome, otherwise, Rachael, if you're reading this...Tag! You're it!

Frightened

SM2
Originally uploaded by caseyezeeweb.

This set of photos on Flickr are really freaking me out.

No offense to the person who took them, but those dolls are, umm...

CREEPY!

82%!

Yes. Kaysar returned to the "Big Brother" house with a whopping 82% of the vote. Sweet! I guess America wasn't won over by the diminutive, short-tempered, immature and shirtless fireman.


Thanks to all who voted via Musty TV. All three of you!

Janice is Awesome, Courtney...Not So Much

You gotta check out The Superficial today.

Loves it!

Snot Comes From Detroit

OK. I am coming in late to this, but I can not believe someone hasn't bought me, or told me about, or even mentioned the Haggis-On-Whey World of Unbelievable Brilliance books!

But you know what? That's fine. Because it obviously means no one else has heard of them either. Which means you're all going to get copies for Christmas! So be sure not to go to Amazon to check out some pages from "Your Disgusting Head" and " Giraffes? Giraffes! (Giraffes? Giraffes!)" because you don't want to be spoiled about your gift.

Also, don't read the following excerpt:

We are here to learn about giraffes, or GIRAFFES. Giraffes are animals, sometimes known as aminals. Definition: Aminal (optional: animal): a being or creature that walks or flies and eats food. Aminals usually inhabit the Earth, roaming and looking at this and that and chewing cud or gum, but can sometimes inhabit your body cavities, where it is dark.

And now that all that not reading is through, I've got to go learn more about how Feranando de la Mancini Goldfarb invented the ear in 1911 (also a good year for yeast.).

So Long, Barbara

Most remember her from "Dallas," but she'll always be Midge to me.

TV Guide, We're Gonna Miss You

Slate has a good article about the history, and relative importance of "TV Guide". As you may have heard, "TV Guide" is getting a makeover: It's getting bigger (in size) while also shrinking (no more exhaustive TV listings, more fluff articles.)

I admit to finding this news rather sad. Granted, I haven't bought an issue of "TV Guide" that didn't have some kind of groovy lenticular image on the front in years. And I have TiVo to thank for that. Of course, I'm not the only one who's stopped buying it, and the advent of TiVo, Internet TV guides, and digital cable's on screen guides has made the "Guide" aspect of "TV Guide" kind of moot. I know my life has become a lot easier because of them. (I used to have to comb each page of the TV Guide each week in order to compile my "Musty TV" newsletter. It took a ridiculously long time!) So, to those 10 people who still rely on "TV Guide": Dudes. Get TiVo already! Sheesh! It's 13 bucks a month. Isn't that almost the same amount it costs to buy the magazine every week?

But yes, I'll still miss seeing that little book-sized magazine sitting right by the check-out line at the grocery store. Which reminds me! They're gonna have to get rid of those racks, and get some new ones to accommodate the magazine's bigger size. Will those racks become--collector's items? There are people out there who collect old "TV Guides." Now they'll be able to stock up on racks!

I see a million dollar eBay idea there!

Or at least, five bucks or so.

I Haven't the Patience

But I hear the British site for Lost is cool. If you like slow-loading graphics and clicking around randomly.

Is She Kidding?

The great thing about Janice Dickinson is, you can never really tell.

One, of many memorable quotes in the interview: "They can say anything they want on America'’s Next Top Model. I don't give a rat's ass; I know who I am. I worked for Vogue."

Finally!

SFist! Up! Now! GO!

A Mystery Solved

I might be one of the few chicks out there who actually subscribes to Esquire magazine (and apparently even the magazine itself can't believe it, as the address label always reads "Mr. Rain"). For the past few months they've been running a feature called The Sexiest Woman Alive: Who Is She?, revealing a few clues and body parts each month. I was convinced it was Scarlett Johansson, but after doing some research, it appears to be somebody else, and all I can say is "Sexiest Woman Alive"?

Nuh-uh.

A Vote for Cappy Means You Hate America

I love that a Google search for "vote for Cappy" brings up approximately 80 links, while "vote for Kaysar" brings up over 22,000 links.

So, if Eric comes back to the house, you'll all know the voting was rigged. RIGGED I tell ya!

P.S. Vote for Kaysar.

Where's Gulager?

Fans of the last season of "Project Greenlight" will be happy to hear that Feast will probably be released just in time for Christmas--which is a little sooner than the previously reported January 2006 release date.

As for the future of the series, Matt Damon isn't holding out hope.

A Show So Bad...

I totally forgot to consciously ignore it! NBC's reality series The Law Firm was cancelled after just two episodes.

Has TV's love affair with lawyers FINALLY, mercifully, ended?

Here We Go Again

Of course the anniversary of Marilyn Monroe's death couldn't pass without some yahoo coming out of the woodwork with evidence about the "true" nature of her death. Perhaps this is more interesting to me than most people (I've read an embarrassingly large number of Marilyn Monroe biographies), but something tells me we're never really going to know what happened.

But then again, I've spent my life thinking I'd never know who the real Deep Throat was, and thinking crop circles were mysterious creations. I'm ready for another of Life's Big Mysteries to be solved.

I'm Lame. I Know.

Yeah. I watch "Big Brother." And I'm ashamed. I hate it. I hate the people. I hate how boring it can be. I hate how it's on, like, EVERY NIGHT. But still I watch. So do me a favor and click on the photo, and when you get to the BB6 site, vote for Kaysar to be returned to the house. He was the only non-annoying guy there, and he's kind of cute, and I want him to come back. (But whatever you do, do NOT click on the photo of the bald idiot in the middle.)

Thanks.

In related news, why is the font on this post so funky?


And in "How the Hell Did I Not Know This?" News

According to this article SNL's Maya Rudolph is having director P.T. Anderson's baby. I had been wondering what he's been doing recently, and realize now it wasn't "what" but "who."

OH! Snap!

Anyway, the article also talks about how he's been hanging around the set of the new Robert Altman movie and might come in to pinch-hit if Altman should collapse from a heart attack or something. He IS 80 after all.

I *Heart* Buster Bluth

This week's SFist post is now up! Oh...Buster.

I Promise To Stop Talking About My Vacation

Eventually. But first let me talk some more about What I Did On My Summer Vacation.

I got a tan. Sort of. I couldn't lay in the 110 degree heat for very long, so I stayed in the shade as much as possible.

I got stung by a fire ant while floating on a raft in the pool. (I guess it was HIS raft or something. Sheesh!)

I saw dinosaurs and learned that evolution is a bunch of baloney! For some reason, whoever manages the dinosaurs in Cabazon, California doesn't think that whole "evolution" thing is true, and the brochures available at the gift shop, as well as their official Web site, explain as much. Weird.

I touched clothes that were once worn by Ginger Rogers, and bought a purse she May or May Not Have Owned. There's a great thrift store in Palm Springs called Celebrity Seconds, and it's full of Ginger Rogers' hand me-downs. Alas, she was a size 4 (with size 6 feet) so I wasn't able to buy any of her previous outfits, but it was still amazing to check them out. It's like a costume museum where everything is for sale.

Sheer Joy

That's what I'm feeling being back at work. Days spent floating in a pool? Free breakfasts? Fresh baked cookies at night? Pshaw! Nothing's better than what I'm doing right now.

::SOB:: Take me back!

OK...I'll survive. But will CBGB?

Not All in My Head

My interview with author Paula Kamen is now up at SFist. Go, now, go!

Happy Birth-Day, Dear Musty...

A day late and a dollar short, but I felt it should be noted that this here blog is officially one year old!! It's still drooling a bit, and only just beginning to crawl, but at least the babbling is making a little more sense.

Here's to year two!